Wednesday, 2 January 2013

Perpetual student

I just can’t seem to forego a year without some form of study. Already this year, I’ve learnt how to save a life. This could be a great dinner party trick, particularly if I wish to save girls from evil step-mothers, ala, Snow White. The Prince is no longer charged with dislodging the piece of apple with a kiss, I'll simply use the Heimlich maneuver. I can finally drive, but I have no need for CD’s with car tunes just yet, and it’ll be another 8 months before I can hire. I’ll have to find a Thelma for my Louise to go driving with. I can't avoid being so square: certain times of the year are very dangerous for me, I run the risk of committing to various programmes of further study, as if I haven’t done enough already. It clearly coincides with the start of university terms; I tend to gaze lovingly at university programmes annually. It’s as powerful as a new moon on the tides of the sea, willing the motion of the waves in peaks towards the sky. Wouldn’t a PHD in quantum physics be useful? Or, I could learn how to create software platforms, a course on creative writing is probably more of interest, or Irish theatre, the history of wars, the list could be endless. I can’t really explain why I’ve caught this bug, I’ve even listened to all of David Starkey’s history programmes on 4OD, whilst working from home. But then, I don’t just think about experiences to learn on some course or another. I’m equally susceptible to the idea of signing up to an NGO in Outer Mongolia, or somewhere equally unfamiliar to most travellers. I recently watched the motor cycle diaries, and the desire to do something humanitarian in the middle of nowhere, captured my imagination. It would be somewhat different from my little volunteer job at an Oxfam shop when I was a teenager, but then giving up half a Saturday is fairly generous for most teenagers. It was one of my favourite jobs, I didn’t have to be there for a start, and if I felt like calling in sick, I could. It wasn’t like the manager of the shop, a volunteer herself, would tell me to never come back. Yet, I never did, I didn’t wish to let the team down; besides, I was left alone to talk to all the old people and listen to radio one. I also had the pick of the new items which came into the shop, learned how to save some money too. I still have an Oxfam teddy bear I paid for, even though I didn’t have to. I could travel, just like the rest of generation X, clad with big walking boots, a back-pack and a flower skirt, on some eternal quest for what’s ‘real’. Yet, I'd be simultaneously side-lined by the foreign city pub-crawl and a cute boy. Or romantically be Brian Wilson’s, ‘surfer girl’, just taking each day at a time, and dossing about on some beach, physically active, sea-salted like a KP nut. It could be considerably more worthwhile than anything taught on a course. I’d be better encouraged to be fluent in German, if I had a German Mann to share the lingua with. Or continue with my path to be a good singer until one day, I might be performing, even if only for fun. I could dance away my days getting vertically active with Tango and a man good enough to lead me.

Companions brunch

I was recently asked to meet some escort companions for dinner and a-get-together. I was pleasantly surprised that another lady took the time to contact me and a few other select ladies because I haven’t really made any friends with any other escort companions, I am a lone wolf. Possibly because I grew up with a ‘keep your head down’ approach and don’t attract attention. But I understand that really means something when you have to work in industries dominated by women, for example table dancing. But I am talking about 30 plus women, dressed ready for a red carpet event in competition against each other; table-dancing is not the sisterhood. As a result, I am very glad that currently, I spend much of my nine-to-five working with men; men are rather uncomplicated creatures to get along with. There were ladies who thought they owned the rights to the songs that they danced to, and far too many that thought they already had the ultimate career, consequently they didn’t educate themselves for another day. Sadly I witnessed too many young girls living in a spiral of parties, gossip, alcohol and drugs. Another aspect I didn’t like was watching several of the girls, circling the clients at the club, in the same way vultures circle a carcass in the wilderness. I might like to shot guns, but I was never the hunting type; I rarely enjoyed the unsolicited introductions that were required to be successful in table dancing clubs. Not only is it easier when a gentleman chooses to introduce themselves, but it is far more pleasurable and relaxing. So when Anais, at first contacted me, I admired that she had put herself forward and took the time and effort to arrange a meeting. I figured it would be the perfect time to find out more about how other ladies manage their affairs and share information. I set aside my reservations, I have met very few ladies who are companions and I remained curious. I had the same questions most gentlemen ask themselves before arranging to meet an escort companion. Does she really look like that? Will she be a pleasant person to meet? Will our personalities gel together? What do escort companions provide? Needless to say my reservations were unfounded, in our small gathering of five, whilst we were all different; they were normal, ambitious women just like me. For a start, no-one looked like a porn-star, for all anyone would have known, we were five friends meeting for an evening meal. We came to discuss what makes the perfect companion, the perfect client and how to be friends within the boundaries. We all agreed the best companion is not only a part-time companion, but a lady with professional means. Even though this might lead to a lack of availability, but then a companion should not be sitting around bored at home waiting for opportunities. Her life is already full, with an educated mind and opinions. Although there is patient expectation, hopefully whilst waiting, the time will have passed effortlessly. Generally in return, I hope to have been charmed, and possibly learned something in communication, and there is nothing better than charisma and positivity. In return, discretion is paramount, no matter what happens. We also re-examined in conversation how a client should behave when arranging dates and meeting ladies, and we should be afforded the same courtesy as any other lover or partner, after all we also lead professional lives. Making-up trips to New York for example as a means to cancel our time together, or emails to cancel the night before could only lead to the end of the relationship. Fortunately, most gentlemen do understand that escort companions lead busy lives which have to be balanced like everyone else. We also discussed why we entered our profession and where we hoped it would lead. Everyone had a multitude of reasons, studies, flexibility, a desire to meet interesting men, someone to learn from, and to live a life less ordinary in addition to financial support to make the above possible. Like any other career, obviously you get to meet with people you decide are suitable friends and companions, and other times, people you would rather not meet again. But what was evident is how rational all of us were about that prospect, especially because life is too short for emotional vampires. Most of all, the most useful thing about the night was learning that women can work together to support each other rather than compete against each other, and even though we made our choice to be escort companions, we are just ordinary women, with just that little bit more experience!